Everything I need to know about life, I learned from killing smart people and eating their brains. Also, I get a lot from wearing crazy t-shirts every day. When you're a brain-eating cannibal who can steal memories by eating brain, then the crazy t-shirts are just fair warning to the people who may ( or may not) be your next victim.
I don't eat people's brains every day, mind you. Whenever I wake up and feel a bit slow, I find that a good dose of brains is what the doctor calls for to get a pep back in my step. Also, brains and scrambled eggs make for a great breakfast. There's something about all that protein that really gets my brain working...also, the assimilated memories and brain power is pretty great too.
I may eat a normal-person brain every once in a while between special brains if I can feel myself slowing down. When the color-lines refuse to cross me, then I have to MAKE them connect with a few brain smoothies. No big deal. I only have to do something crazy like that if my unicorn hunts turn up empty...which they often are, these days.
What's with all the werewolves chilling out with the unicorns? There was a time in the not-too-distant past when I could score one, maybe two, unicorn brains in a single night. I could usually grab a princess brain too, but not any more. Now the stupid unicorns hang out with werewolves all night. I can't mess with werewolves. I'm allergic to them.
Being insane is fun. You don't have to worry about what other people think because they're usually thinking that you're crazy...which is okay, since you are. Crazy t-shirts are pretty good at advertising your insanity. When you put on a crazy t-shirt you're telling the world, "Hey, I'm a crazy person who may eat your brains so that his unicorn hunt goes smoothly as long as the werewolf bodyguards are drunk enough off wood beers not to smell you. Also, I may be a zombie."
I don't eat people's brains every day, mind you. Whenever I wake up and feel a bit slow, I find that a good dose of brains is what the doctor calls for to get a pep back in my step. Also, brains and scrambled eggs make for a great breakfast. There's something about all that protein that really gets my brain working...also, the assimilated memories and brain power is pretty great too.
I may eat a normal-person brain every once in a while between special brains if I can feel myself slowing down. When the color-lines refuse to cross me, then I have to MAKE them connect with a few brain smoothies. No big deal. I only have to do something crazy like that if my unicorn hunts turn up empty...which they often are, these days.
What's with all the werewolves chilling out with the unicorns? There was a time in the not-too-distant past when I could score one, maybe two, unicorn brains in a single night. I could usually grab a princess brain too, but not any more. Now the stupid unicorns hang out with werewolves all night. I can't mess with werewolves. I'm allergic to them.
Being insane is fun. You don't have to worry about what other people think because they're usually thinking that you're crazy...which is okay, since you are. Crazy t-shirts are pretty good at advertising your insanity. When you put on a crazy t-shirt you're telling the world, "Hey, I'm a crazy person who may eat your brains so that his unicorn hunt goes smoothly as long as the werewolf bodyguards are drunk enough off wood beers not to smell you. Also, I may be a zombie."
About the Author:
To learn more about funny shirts you should check out cool t-shirts for an informative product site.
No comments:
Post a Comment